Who's been a naughty Dictator then..?

I overslept this morning. Not because I was tired, although I was tired but that's not why I overslept. No, I overslept because I was in the middle of a conversation with a Russian dictator when my alarm went off and it was a Very Important Conversation, which I felt it important to finish. So I killed my alarm and continued with what I was doing.

He wasn't actually Russian, to be perfectly accurate. He comes from one of those small countries on the border between America and Russia - you know, where their borders meet over the top of the globe, where the ice cap isn't. The name of the country on the map is somewhere between the names 'Monrovia' and 'Armenia', I forget what it was exactly. I got there because I was looking at the map and I jabbed a pencil at it and the next thing I was there, surrounded by what I can only assume was some sort of peace-keeping force, judging by the beige jeeps and army tents, but lack of weapons.
I often travel to places in this manner at night.

So we were looking around the place, in this big warehouse full of artifacts and treasures from this Dictator's reign, safe in the knowledge that he was far away somewhere in hiding. But then when I stepped into the bathroom to change my clothes (no, I don't know why, I just knew I was the only woman there so I needed to change behind closed doors), well there, trying to keep as quiet as possible, was this Dictator. He was afraid of being found and not at all scary, contrary to his reputation. He explained that he just wanted his son back, and if America gave his son back (which it couldn't, really, since his son was there of his own free will, studying at a university so it wasn't actually their place to give him back) then he would stop being a Dictator. I tried to explain all this to him, and that he was only hurting his people and his country by being a Dictator, but the silly man wouldn't listen.
So I just turned my back on him and ate my hotdog, which was really nice; all filled with tomato & onion relish that was dripping down the sides.
And when I'd finished my hotdog, I woke up.

After all, I really needed to get moving if I wanted to get to work on time.