Wednesday, August 24, 2005

All aboard!

Y'know what one of the best things about Blogging is? The amount of times I have seen, in black and white, on the Internet, for all the world to see, statements such as, "I agree with Terri", in response to something I have said. I love being right, hehe! I mean, I know that I am always right, it is just seldom that other people admit it willingly.
Right, so, I'll just swap my tongue to the other cheek quickly.

Now, having said all that I also think I may be losing my mind [Insert witty comments here... there ya go, feel better now? Can I continue?]

I seem to have a block in my brain that sometimes prevents me from being able to think. I desperately try & remember something and it's just blank, it won't come out. This is a relatively new experience for me and I find it extremely disturbing. Especially at the moment, at work, when I'm trying to learn as much as I can in my 'temporary' new position, because basically I am trying to change my career. So you see, it's actually quite important that my brain is working right now. But every now & then it just seems to grind to a halt. Th-th-th-th-that's all folks! I get this blank, glazed look, and people are talking to me but I can't hear what they're saying. Fortunately they all think I have a problem still with understanding the Irish accent, so I'm forgiven for not hearing them the first time around. Which doesn't really let me off the hook when they repeat themselves and I'm still clueless.
So I just smile pleasantly and hope they weren't expecting an insightful answer. An accepting nod of the head in the right place also seems to get me out of some sticky situations, but occasionally it comes back to bite me in the ass when someone will mention something, and I'll sort of go, "Huh?"
Then they look at me as if to say, "Where have you been, Mars?"

This might be closer to the truth than they imagine, hehe.
Not that I've actually been to Mars, of course - in fact I've never physically left Earth's atmosphere (I know, it's a shock) - but I do spend an awful lot of time in what my hubby calls "TerriLand". It's a wonderful place, a place where my mind goes when it's tired of reality. Which, frankly, is quite often.

I kind of drift off and allow things to kind of float through my mind at will, often with confusing results. By that I mean I will be in conversation with someone about something, and they'll carry on talking (or not, as the case may be), and my mind will go on from that topic and just follow whatever linked thoughts happen to pass by, until eventually the next thing I say will have absolutely nothing to do with what we were talking about. When I realised this was causing hubby to think I was completely insane, I became concerned that he might come at me with one of those comfy white jackets with the really long sleeves, so I actually started working backwards through my chain of thoughts, out loud, so he could see where my latest one had come from. He understands now and I'm pleased to report that the white coat is on ice for the moment.
You see, it all makes sense in my head! Why can't the rest of the world keep up?

And that's another thing I love about Blogging: I have come to realise that I AM NOT ALONE. It turns out there are dozens, possibly hundreds of people of similar disposition out there, with busy heads filled with deep thoughts and nonsense, and this is just such a great way of airing one's head, don'tcha think? Ha ha, does that make us air-heads? [Sorry, sometimes my corny-ness overwhelms me!]

sigh! I think in my next life I definitely want to come back as a sock. Aha! Gotcha there, don't I?! You're just dying to know how I went from air-heads to socks, aren't you?! Well okay then: I was thinking about the whole airing-my-head thing, and it made me think about being out in the open, and where better to be for that than on a desert island? Which reminded me of a comment I left on Kyknoord's Blog earlier this week, where he told us that according to an advert currently running on SA television, all those missing socks apparently end up on a desert island somewhere having a whale of a time.

So I repeat: I want to come back as a sock.
Just not a pink one. I hate pink. I know - you'd never guess considering the template I chose for my blog, eh? It irks me only occasionally, but it is actually quite tasteful, even if it IS pink. Actually I chose it 'cos of the picture/banner thing across the top - it kind of reminds me of some of the stuff I've seen in European cities during my travels, and since I write a lot about my travelling... well you get the idea. Starting to get the hang of my train-of-thought thing yet?

Speaking of trains-of-thought [you're gonna love this...] I had a thought on the train on the way home [Yes, I know it's lame, but I was compelled to do it!] but it seems to have disappeared again although doubtless it will hit me again at a later stage like a [er, dare I say it?] express train. [Ok, I'll stop with the locomotive references now.]
Which brings me back to my first (or was it my second?) thought earlier and that is that I fear my mind is departing in pieces.
Although some would say it's been coming for a while now.
Or perhaps it was never really all there in the first place.
Ooh, I feel a heavy thinking session coming on.... whooosh..... nope, there it goes - didn't even stop at the station. [That's the last one, I promise!]

Yes people, I'm afraid this sort of stuff does go on inside my head pretty much all the time. Scary, huh? Fortunately it only occasionally falls out of my mouth, although I do have a tendency to think out loud sometimes, when I am particularly deep in thought. Whenever I sit next to a new person at work I find they'll often say, "Did you say something?" and I'll have to say, "Er, no, sorry, just talking to myself." After a while they get used to it and just ignore it, so it will get to a point where I will have to physically tap them or call their name when I want to speak to them, otherwise I just become background noise.
[Eesh, talk about opening yourself up to witty sarcasm!]

So, like, whatever, enjoy my little insane ramblings or move on. The choice is yours. Me, I'll just retire back to TerriLand now for a while. Maybe I'll see you there sometime...


Underachiever said...

Hey, mind if I crash at Terriland? I have beer.

Thanks, just show me to my room.

Undr(unwanted guest)

kyknoord said...

I definitely agree with everything Terri said.

DelBoy said...

Lost you after the second paragraph Cuz...

BTW, it's called 'old age'!

BUDDESS said...

Good to know I am not alone on this train ride!!! Just don't like those sudden stops:-)

Terri said...

Undr, you're more than welcome in TerriLand, especially if u bring beer.
KN, that is the correct answer :-)
Del, keep up old man... and I mean that - you ARE older than I am, remember? Or has the alzheimers' kicked in already? hehe
Buddess, well then we should invite Undr to come along too - he'll bring beer!

Bosbefok said...

Where DID I put that fluffy white jacket with the EXTRA LONG AND STRONG sleeves....?

anne said...

Ah some derailed train of thought... Love those. Thanks for visiting!

Ben O. said...

That is such an underrated benefit of constantly talking to yourself - eventually people ignore you.

Oh to be ignored sometimes.

Ben O.

Terri said...

Bosbefok, I hid it where you'll never find it: The kitchen, in the cleaning-goodies cupboard.
Anne, glad to oblige, stop by anytime.
yes folks, this is me ignoring Ben

BUDDESS said...

Ben?? Was there a Ben??